wait a minute! am i pregnant?

it’s about time for my eggs to get back in business.

i nursed elijah for full two and a half years. i thought i completely turned into a mother, but i was still a woman after all.

at the beginning of december, i got a severe stomach flu thanks to elijah (he’s full of germs, this child). one bright side of this stomach flu is that it lasts only a couple of days.  but long after i expected to get better, i was still feeling nauseated and had no appetite. my first instinct was “am i pregnant?”, but you don’t want to put your hopes up too high just in case the result is otherwise.

the nausea continued for the next two weeks and i couldn’t eat a thing.  i decided to get a pregnancy test and check. i bought it secretly and i didn’t tell paul that i was checking, in case the result was disappointingly negative.

(11w ultrasound)

a morning of 23rd, i got up early and took the pregnancy test to the bathroom.  the result was ready in one minute, but i couldn’t make myself look for about five minutes.  i must admit that i tried to get a glimpse at it with my peripheral vision.  i was talking myself into believing the worst case scenario so that i wouldn’t feel as disappointed as if i imagined the best.

finally i made up my mind and looked at it.  POSITIVE!

i dashed into our bedroom where paul was still sleeping. i told him that i was pregnant. he gave me the biggest hugs and kisses.   it was the best christmas gift ever.

(20w pregnant)

that was already three months ago. i’m 21w pregnant this week. i started to feel the baby moving early — around 15w. the baby is very active. when we went for an ultrasound at 12w, the baby was rolling around and i couldn’t stop laughing with happiness. as i laughed, it was bouncing around as if my womb was a trampoline. i kept laughing until the radiologist jokingly settled me down.

(12w ultrasound)

at first, i thought about naming this baby, “peko chan” since i was very hungry! (‘peko peko’ is a sound to describe ‘hungry’ in japanese)  “poko chan” was elijah’s nickname when he was in my womb. “peko chan” and “poko chan” would be perfect, i thought. but the name was strongly rejected by elijah saying 『ちがうよ、ママ。ベービーちゃんでしょ！(no, mama. it’s baby-chan!)』

so, i’ve been saying “baby-chan” ever since.

elijah talks to baby-chan every day through my belly button.

『ベービーちゃん、今な〜にしてるの？』（baby-chan, what are you doing?）
『ベービーちゃん、ヨーグルトあげますからね〜』（baby-chan, i’ll give you yogurt.）
『ベービーちゃん、はやくでてきて、おにいちゃんと遊ぼうね〜』（baby-chan, come out soon and play with your brother.）

elijah tells me he’s pregnant too. he gives birth every day. he’s been pregnant with many things — baby, alligator, digger, panda, etc… if i accidentally bump into his belly, he says,『おなか、さわらないでね。ベービーちゃんいるからね。(don’t touch my belly, will you? there is a baby inside.)』

(2 and 7 months old cherry mustache man)

my happy second pregnant life continues…